You know that feeling. It’s almost a nausea in the pit of your stomach. That feeling of something’s just not quite right. And it leads to the need to chase after something, and maybe you don’t even know what that something is. Maybe you label it anxiety, depression, frustration, or lack of direction. But really it’s that feeling of not enough! And if you could just get that one thing, it would ease some of the stress, pain, or fear.
But what is that thing you’re chasing after? Well, I can tell you this, it’s not a house, a car, a better job, an ideal relationship, a perfect body, money or even status.
What you’re chasing after cannot be caught from the external world. Because what you’re really chasing after, is a feeling.
Anything we do or desire in life, we do because we think it will bring us a specific emotion.
And even if we get that beautiful sparkly thingamajig, or finally achieve that grand something or other, the feeling it leaves behind is fleeting.
There are many reasons you may feel dissatisfied with your life. Here are some of the fundamental reasons, and how you can fix them.
1. You don’t have a vision-The best GPS in the world can’t get you where you want to go if you don’t know your destination. Many of us are moving through life just trying to manage our day-to-day tasks. And if you don’t have a crystal clear vision of your future, you may end up somewhere you just don’t want to be.
The fix-decide what you want your life to look like. Not just now, but the big picture. When you’re old and gray and looking back who is the person you want to have become? Set your goals and write them down. There’s something magical about writing things down.
2. Lack of action-sometimes we know exactly what we want, but we are so overwhelmed by all the work it will take to get there, that we just do nothing. And when you do nothing, that’s exactly what you end up with, nothing.
The fix-Take action now! make a firm commitment to start following through. Take small steps every day, and eventually your desired outcome is inevitable.
3. Indecisiveness-often we get so caught up and not wanting to make the wrong decision, we end up either not making one at all, or taking way too long. Think of the time wasted that you could have been moving toward something amazing.
The fix-weigh your options and make a decision quickly. If it ends up being the wrong decision, at least you’ll know, and can make a new decision, but this time with greater insight.
4. Believing that Accomplishments=Fulfilment- we tend to believe that when we achieve something we really want, it’s going to bring us happiness. But that simply isn’t true, because once we get there, there’s always another level. The happiness and fulfillment that we gain from our accomplishments may linger for hours days or even months, but it’s not sustainable.
The fix-what truly brings us happiness and fifth element that is long-lasting, is progress. Progress is growth either mentally, emotionally, spiritually, or even physically. If you’re not growing, you were dying, so figure out what you want, and start making some progress.
5. No compelling reasons for change-sometimes we become so accustomed to moving through life with this uneasy, dissatisfied feeling, that we don’t even realize there is a better way. How many people do you know, that actually love their life? Unfortunately we have been taught things like “Life is hard”, or”You have to be realistic”, and we get so used to feeling dissatisfied, that we think it’s normal! We don’t usually hit a point where we actually want to create positive change in our life, until things are so bad that we tell ourselves “Not another day, not another minute, not another second, can I live this way”. But let me ask you a question, do you really want to wait till you hit rock bottom to decide to start living an amazing life?
The fix-Start now. wherever you are in life, decide not to settle for anything less than what you truly desire. You must create compelling reasons for change.
Questions to ask yourself:
Why is right now the best time to start making positive changes in my life?
Where will I be in 5, 10, or even 20 years if I continue on my current path?
How much time will I have wasted?
What regrets might I have if I don’t make these changes?
If I start right now to creat positive change, what are the possibilities?
If I take action now, how much further will I get then if I put it off?
6. Insecurity/Feeling not good enough- This is a big one, and I think is the root of most people’s issues. We often compare ourselves to the most successful people in the business of whatever it is we do. It seems like everyone’s just looking for some recognition or attention. But fame and fortune do not equal happiness. Some of the most successful people in the world are not happy. And you can certainly be happy without massive success.
The fix-Whatever it is you think you want or need in life in order to feel good, is not the answer. Happiness is not an object, a career, or a relationship. It’s just a feeling, an emotion that comes from within you. It’s a state of mind. It’s a choice. Stop beating yourself up. Stop feeling not good enough. Life is just a game, and you are not in competition with anyone but yourself. So why not choose to win?